Life Abroad, Studies

First Day in London

September 29, 2017

Today marks (almost) two weeks of me being in London.

I thought classes would have started by now seeing how the university had insisted that we enrolled before the end of last week, but I just found out that I will only officially regain status as a student in the month of October. Why on earth did I fly in this early for then?!

But I figured that its not all bad since I’m pretty much settled in now, so when classes start I should have little to no trouble falling into a routine. I’ve stocked up on any supplies I may need in the first couple weeks (sketchbooks, modelling material, glue, etc.) and non-perishable food items that I know will come in handy on the inevitable days where I would be so drowned in work, even walking a 100 metres to the nearest Select & Save would seem like a giant conquest.

Its also a good thing that I have another couple days because my Windows laptop have decided to throw a spitting tantrum, and I need it to be in working condition in time for class because God knows my 8-year-old Macbook will not live through AutoCad, Photoshop, Sketchup running (simultaneously) most of the time. Its burning up my thighs as it is right now, and I only have Chrome open. Note: Get yourself that portable laptop desk with a fan to use in bed.

So what have I been up to the past week?

Continue Reading…

Life Abroad

Time to Suck it Up!

September 21, 2017

Time: 0406 hours.

Location: The Greenwich Peninsula, London.

Context: I’ve been asleep now for more than 10 hours, and can’t fall back to sleep even if someone hammered me in the head.

Today, I enter my third day in London aka my third day without Hadzray. If you told teenager Nadhrah that she would be living in London one day, she would be thrilled because if you must know, I had wanted to come here for as long as I can remember (blame this book I read for making London sound absolutely magical) and it had been something that had motivated me to ace every big exam throughout my school career.

I’m here now and while I want to be happy to call this place home for the next two years… I can’t. Because I know, in my heart and in my mind, that home is wherever my husband is. And he’s not here. So this (London) is not home, not unless Hadzray is here with me.

If you can’t already guess; I’m having a miserable first couple days here.

So much of my days back home are spent with Hadzray that I feel decapitated being here by myself. I am independent and always have been, but I’ve gotten so used to his company with almost everything I do (we even share the same hobbies) that experiencing anything on my own feels strange, for the lack of a better word.

I know I know that this is all depressing, but its the truth. There hadn’t been a day since I left home that I haven’t cried and sobbed and cried and sobbed again. But we made the decision for me to come here together, as a couple, and that is about the only thing that comforts me – to know that it wasn’t a selfish decision coming here and leaving Hadzray behind.

I’m here pursuing my Masters, because after a lot of discussion and going back and forth… we felt its the right thing for me to do at what is possibly the only right time in my life. I’m not getting any younger, and believe it or not – especially coming from me, your resident baby hater; I would like the option of starting a family available to me sooner than later.

So… lets doodis, and try to have fun in the process – because its London, for God’s sakes!


A Saturday Afternoon.

June 3, 2017

Its a balmy Saturday afternoon, and I’m currently at home (in Bukit Antarabangsa) playing catch-up with some work. Normally I would avoid doing work over the weekend, but I have a meeting this coming Tuesday to prepare for and 8 months into this job now… I know that its better that I get things done a couple days before any meeting – because my boss(es) would almost always have something they want to change a day before.

But I don’t mind it as much, since being that its the month of Ramadhan, everything sort of slows down a bit; including my ever restless husband, who would usually insist that spend our time outside of the house over the weekend.

My husband is asleep now, less than five feet away from me, on the couch of our humble living room. He’s wearing briefs covered with graphic of fried eggs as pattern. And glancing over at him now; I’m overcome with a feeling of guilt, contentedness and also frankly, a bit of sadness.

Guilt, because I’ve just broken his blinkers the night before (and it isn’t the first thing of his I’ve manage to break). Contentedness because I still find it difficult to believe that I’ve got a husband, and an amazing one at that. Lastly, sad, because… well, thats a story for another day.

I’m writing now because frankly, I miss it. Writing. Back in school, I’ve never minded writing essays – be it for homework or for examinations. Because I loved writing, and as long as I kept putting pen to paper – I was happy. But years went on, and I wrote a lot less. Nowadays, I almost never do. So this post is for me.

What I’ve written here so far bears no importance whatsoever, but seeing words forming sentences forming paragraphs on this little white text box makes me feel…light. You don’t need to understand, because none of this is for you.

In less than 30 minutes I’ll need to wake my husband up because Ramadhan or not… I’ve insisted that we go somewhere because I know my husband too well to know that he’ll regret having stayed at home doing basically nothing all day.

So now, its time for me to get back to work.